We all have core beliefs through which we define ourselves. These are largely established by living life and are in place by time we are seven years old. Once they are set, we seem to attract — sometimes as if by magic, sometimes as if cursed — life experiences that validate them.
Past Dictating Present and Future
Long ago, we integrated both empowering and limiting messages into our very being.
- You’re the smart one.
- You’re so lazy!
- Nothing you do is ever good enough!
- We always get by.
- There is not enough.
Recognizing how these beliefs influence us, we can decide to be mindful when speaking to and interacting with our children, as they establish their own core beliefs. There is no need to approve of or permit every action. We can notice and love what is good in our children. We can be curious about behaviors that we do not understand.
Before we react to our children’s actions and words, we can decide to consider the possibility that there is a reason for the behavior we are seeing. We can strive to understand. Observing without judgement and with curiosity can be life changing.
I Recognize a Limiting Belief
Earlier this year, I noticed that I have not been meeting my goals for a long time. “I used to be so Type-A,” I lamented to a friend. “I finished everything! Even things I didn’t like.” As I trailed off, a light bulb went off over my head.
A-ha! That was it! Throughout my childhood, adolescence, and early adult life, I had accomplished almost everything I set out to do. The strongest and longest-lasting example is that I persevered (persiverated?) through a college curriculum that perplexed and terrified me. This resulted in a degree in a field that did not interest me. Which led to jobs I did not enjoy.
I finally learned my lesson: Working hard gives me what I don’t want anyway. So, I will not work hard.
Once we recognize the repeating patterns in our in lives, we can change them. Processes such as Matrix Reimprinting with EFT offer simple and effective ways to change. (I teach the Core Belief Reimprinting process during my seven week Swan Mothers Circle.)
When I recognized that I believed that hard work gave me what I don’t want, I worked with my Matrix Reimprinting practitioner to find old stories that supported this belief. I began working with the Core Belief Process. And I am learning to work joyfully and consistently at that which matters to me.
Curious what I’m working on? I’m writing a fiction trilogy called The Weaving Gold Chronicles. I’d love to know what you’re up to.